Meghan and I headed out Saturday with a list of a ton of sales in our neighborhood. There was a fledgling annual neighborhood sale across town that we considered hitting, but since there were only about 15 sales on their map we decided to just stick close to home. (Sounds like it went pretty well! Maybe we’ll make it over there next year.)

So we set out to various sales nearby: block sales, moving sales, and one weird sale set up at a long-abandoned gas station, where Meghan quickly sniffed out the only two items worth buying (a vintage rhinestone jewelry set and a very old book which I can’t recall anything about now other than that it was cool — I think she paid $5 for both).

At one sale they had some pretty good books set out at $1 for hardcovers, 25 cents for paperbacks. I picked up a few things, then I saw Meghan had scooped up I Like You by Amy Sedaris! I have been meaning to buy this book (after flipping through a copy at Meghan’s house), and I think I made a little sad whimpering sound. Meghan said “You have it already, right?” When I shook my head no, she handed it over without thinking twice. Which is just one of the many reasons that she and I are Yard Sale Buddies 4 Life. The seller then asked us, “What is that book about, anyway?” There was an awkward pause while we both tried to think of a quick way to describe this somewhat indescribable book to someone who has never heard of it. Thankfully it was obvious she didn’t really care, as she continued on: “I have no idea what that is. It must be one of my boyfriend’s ex-girlfriend’s books.”

Long time readers may remember us mentioning a yard sale regular who is famous (to us) for leaving his car door open when he stops at yard sales. Guess who drove up at our next stop?

This sale was pretty good, and Meghan bought three cool old dolls from the seller, who was really friendly and appreciated our inane running commentary on her stuff. All I ended up getting were some stickers out of her free pile (including, for some reason, Billy Idol stickers, which I found really entertaining at the time). But she did have a lot of other intriguing items, like these delightful artifacts of the ’80s.

We stopped at a lot of other sales, many of which had “kooky” lines in their Craigslist ads — I’ve noticed this is becoming more common. I’m not opposed to this; how can I be when I generally use the word “craptastic” for my own yard sale ads (even though this once led to the newspaper rejecting my ad due to “profanity”)? But with more people trying to make their listing stand out, interesting descriptions are becoming less indicative of interesting sales.

One sale we stopped at had advertised a tiki bar, but since I didn’t see it there I asked if it had sold. They said, “Oh, it’s in the back.” I knew there was no way I was going to buy it, but I was disappointed not to get to at least check it out. This sale had a ton of high-end men’s clothing at the amazing price of 25 cents each (10 cents for ties). We each picked up a few items just because they were so ridiculously cheap.

Another sale had advertised “Wine Rack – it’s huge and in the shape of a cow!” Amazingly, this was 100% true. Not so amazingly, they hadn’t sold it yet. Meghan asked how one ends up owning such an item and they muttered some story about an auction at a winery some years ago. Unfortunately, I wussed out on taking a photo of it. (But if you can picture a huge cow-shaped wine rack, you are probably not at all far off from what it looked like.)

We pulled up to another sale and Meghan groaned, “They have their sale every year, and they bring out the same stuff!” But this ended up not being such a bad thing, since they at least had the decency to lower their prices … and Meghan picked up a Bauer pot for $5 that she’d passed on at $20 the year before.

We were feeling pretty good hitting so many sales and the weather was even starting to warm up. I decided we should head up northward to an area that can be pretty hit or miss. Our first stop was an estate sale that sounded huge. There were a few items spilling out into the front lawn and the first thing I saw was this.

The second thing I saw was this.

My interest was up, and sure enough there was a houseful … but their prices were nuts! Most things were at least twice as much as you would ever want to pay. And the thing that got me was that it was also crazy disorganized. I mean, it is one thing to charge high prices when you have taken the time to sort and arrange the items. But it’s hard for me to tolerate anything more than bargain basement prices when things look like this.

That’s not so bad, you say? Well, what about this?

It was really weird … there were drawers in a vanity table that had things in them that were priced (ridiculously — like $9 for a fairly ordinary scarf), then just shoved back into the drawer all willy nilly. And you could tell it wasn’t that it had been orderly earlier in the day and then shoppers had run rampant. It’s not like I only want to go to a sale if it is neat and tidy. (I think that should be obvious by now!) But you sort of expect a price break when you are dealing with the likes of this.

There were definitely some interesting things strewn around. It was one of those estate sales where you could tell the person saved everything (and really shouldn’t have). This was one of several Valentine’s candy boxes I saw.

After perusing the living room, kitchen, and bedrooms, I descended into the basement, which was packed full of items in varying stages of crustitude.

It was just jam packed, and after a while the mustiness in the air was getting to me. My hands were starting to feel icky from touching things that looked okay, but felt odd, like maybe they were in the process of slowly liquefying. One area which seemed better-preserved was a little closet full of handmade costumes. I would love to know what kind of wacky performances these were used for!

Meghan picked up a small pile of things and while she paid, I headed outside, gratefully breathing in the fresh air. When she got outside, she discovered that one old bedjacket she had purchased was actually discolored, but it had been impossible to see inside the poorly-lit house. Sad.

I felt like being at this sale kind of ended the good vibe we had going, so I was glad that the next estate sale we went to was refreshingly clean. Unfortunately, there was hardly anything left in it. The few things that were still there didn’t give me the impression we’d missed out on much. I mean, I am pretty sure I don’t need anything previously owned by the person who hung this over their bed.

We had a few more sales to hit in the area before calling it a day. One of them had advertised that they were having an “Economic Stimulus Garage Sale,” but remember what I said about oddball ads not necessarily meaning the sale was good? Yeah. I sort of liked these Sonny and Cher TV guides, but not enough to pay $5 each. I didn’t realize until looking at the photos that she was also attempting to sell contact lens solution and tampons. Yikes!

Meghan was flipping through the books and read the title of one aloud: “The Secret Lives of Teddy Bears.” The woman said, “Oh … it’s just photography of teddy bears.” As if Meghan had been thinking that in this book, the actual secrets of teddy bears’ lives would finally be revealed.

The last sale we went to had some good CDs, priced at $2 or $3 each — too high for just your average CDs (especially when we’d picked some up at three for a buck earlier), but the guy had really decent stuff. We each had a handful and I asked, “Are you going to give us a deal on these CDs?” He hemmed and hawed about how they were already priced, and if they didn’t sell for what he’d marked them, then he’d just keep them … “So, that would be a no,” I said, and cheerily paid what he was asking. Hey, sometimes you have to try.

It was definitely a little bit of everything today, but altogether not a bad haul!

Jenny and I tried to hit some sales on Friday, even though it was rainy and cold. After looking through the ads we found a total of three sales in our area. Eh, we ended up getting breakfast instead.

Saturday turned out to look much more promising, including a block sale directly behind my house. Most of the houses there didn’t even seem halfway ready for a 9:00 sale when we came by at 8:45. I did manage to pick up a couple of Votivo candles for a dollar each from the family that lives directly behind me.

We headed to an estate sale in Olympic Manor where they were giving out numbers, and ended up as #10 and #11. When the guy working the door started talking about no big purses and how everyone needed to take their coats off, I had a flash back to the sale we hit a few years ago that we had to take our shoes off for. There is no way I will ever take my shoes off again for a sale!

One of the first things we saw was this riding costume with the fox mask. Directly next to it was a early ’60s prom dress, displayed with a photo of the woman wearing it at her prom. The price? A whopping $175 … good luck!

This was the sale of the smalls. Pretty much the whole sale was shelves of small stuff. The woman was a crazy collector and everything seemed to have a theme. Dogs, Bugs, Horses, Quilts. Add in the freaks with their loupes, all talking about what this item is worth and what is old and what isn’t. Ehg. This shit gets old really fast. We both managed to get a few cool items.

We went on to a sale in a woman’s garage and it was the most boring sale, but it’s worth noting just because a woman drove by and started yelling, “You’re blocking the driveway!” She said it again, really loud. There was a car parked in front of the driveway where the sale was happening, but the odd thing is she wasn’t trying to come to the sale, it wasn’t her driveway, so why did she even care? Both Jenny and I talked back to her while the woman having the sale was chuckling.

We headed off to something called the St. Margaret of Scotland Parish Yard Sale, Car Show and Polish Festival. We ended up being a little misdirected and went to a completely different church sale across the street. This turned out to be not actually a church sale, but a benefit for someone who had cancer and the church had offered up their parking lot.

It had tons and tons of books, most of them pretty good. The flip side was that nothing was priced — they said “pay what you want.” I don’t mind making an offer, but it’s a little loaded when it’s a benefit for someone that you don’t know. We each left there with a box of stuff, and they seemed happy with our donation.

We crossed the road to hit the Polish festival and it was just bizarre. Two tables of rummage sale items, tables set up for food, and we didn’t see one car that could have been considered as “car show” worthy, with the exception of three guys on Harley Davidson bikes.

The Queen Anne neighborhood had a huge block sale that had been advertised as 30+ homes. At 11:30 we didn’t have that high of hopes, but there were sure a lot of people making the rounds. One of the first sales we hit had a huge table of beakers and glass stoppers.

On another table were a bunch of old food and spice containers. Some of them were really great.

I was tempted by an old Ovaltine container, but when I opened it up it looked a portion of the 1958 classic The Blob had been contained in a jar. SCARY.

At one sale there was a lemonade stand set up which also offered comics at 25 cents. Jenny purchased one of these just because she thought it was cute that the kid was so enterprising (although her mom was the one actually running the stand). She was pretty entertained trying to read it and figure out what was going on. It helped when she figured out that “Monopile” was supposed to be “Monopoly.”

We hit a basement sale whose sign advertised “kiddie courture,” antiques, and more. This sale sucked at a new level. Not everything old should be considered an antique, and just because you can sew doesn’t mean you should.

The 30-house sale stretched over about eight blocks, and since it wasn’t raining we had a nice walk. The sales were pretty picked over, but we did get to see some really great houses. Finally, we raided a free box that was next to our car right before we drove off.

It turned out to be a pretty good day.

Regular guest star Leslie tipped us off that there was a neighborhood sale near where she lives in nearby Bellevue last weekend. We weren’t sure what to expect, since this area isn’t really known for killer sales (high percentages of baby stuff and newer boring items), but it was in a part of town with a lot of great midcentury modern architecture and we hoped that the good would outweigh the bad. Plus, we just felt like doing something different. We got there a little before the official starting time and saw tons of signs, but we stopped at the Official Map Dispensing Location to pick up the Official Map. (Which turned out to be quite helpful — even though there were tons of signs up, the streets around there are awfully crazy and windy and dead-endy.)

The first few sales were nothing special; newer crap like framed pictures and exercise machines, and one with “antiques” that were boring and overpriced. Then we hit one sale where an older woman was still bringing things out. Meghan grabbed a few items off a table where everything was priced at 50 cents — for that kind of price, you don’t need to be too picky. She got two vintage board games (Finance and Scribbage) and a well-preserved stuffing mix box, now full of little muffin tins. She later confessed that she really just wanted to take a picture of it, but figured for 50 cents she would just buy it. I’m sure it will end up in our next sale.

We dug through some jewelry and then Meghan hit the score of the day, digging out a vintage Bulova watch and two 1930’s class rings from a box of stuff the lady hadn’t quite finished putting out yet. I think she paid less than $20 for everything!

Nearby was this sale with a ton of new home decor items. I wondered what the deal was until I noticed a stack of business cards for an interior decorator. Meghan and I both almost purchased sheets here, then rejected them at the last minute when it turned out they were $5 per sheet (not per set).

At another sale Meghan unearthed a kids’ book called The House That Crack Built. She didn’t buy it, but we couldn’t stop talking about it as we made the rounds. Aside from being a little startled by the title, it just seemed out of place among the other more typical kids’ books at the well-to-do suburban house.

We kept seeing signs for a “MEGA SALE” and eventually found it after a few twists and turns. Really, once you got in the general vicinity there was no way you could miss this.

The stuff was spread out along a large driveway and again, seemed to be mostly new, with tons of framed prints for sale. I didn’t think there would be anything there I wanted, but I ended up picking up a 1950s Betty Crocker kids’ cookbook (with suitably retro recipes like molded jello concoctions, a.k.a. “Satan’s Salads“).

We kept going to sale after sale after sale, most of which were sadly pretty boring. Even at the coolest-looking houses, the stuff tended to be mundane. Many sales had lots of stuff, but mainly newer home-decor type items that you just knew no one was going to buy. It was one dud after another and at one point I leaned over to Meghan and said, “A lot of these sales make me feel like I’m at Ross.”

Though to be fair, it wasn’t all run-of-the-mill stuff. There was this heartfelt work of art, for instance.

After a long stretch of not buying anything, we went to a sale outside a community pool where we were each thrilled to purchase a donut, a bottle of water, and a small pile of 50 cent CDs. (That’s the price, not the artist.) Just as we were leaving, it started to rain, with huge big drops seeming to come out of nowhere. The people running the sale started freaking out all their stuff was spread around completely unsheltered at all (it had been nice earlier). As we pulled away I grabbed my camera to take a photo, which was sort of a bad idea because as I was rummaging around for it I spilled my opened bottle of water right into my lap. I was concerned that people would think that I’d peed in my pants, but Meghan assured me that it wasn’t all that noticeable. (Even if this wasn’t true, I appreciated it, because there wasn’t a damn thing I could do about it at that point and I wasn’t about to stop going to people’s sales.) After all that, it wasn’t even that great of a photo.

The rain didn’t last long and we continued around the neighborhood, finding a few more things here and there: kids’ shoes, books, a Bodum tea pot, a crazy Hawaiian dress, and some Polaroid film (amusingly, the box showed a Polaroid of a man talking on a banana-phone). At one of the last sales we hit, a guy was selling crutches, and Meghan proceeded to tell him that you should never get rid of your crutches because that’s usually when something will happen and you will need them again. This thoroughly spooked him and I heard him say quietly to his wife, “Maybe we shouldn’t sell the crutches …” I should have just told him not to worry since it was really unlikely that anyone was going to come along and actually want to buy them.

As we drove away from this sale we noticed that their sign was bilingual. Probably just to be cute, since I didn’t see any roving bands of Japanese yard sale tourists (who surely would have understood “G-Sale” in any case).

We hit just about every sale on the map (over 40!) and then drove back to Seattle. What was really strange is that as we headed towards home, we went for two or three miles along busy streets and saw absolutely no yard sale signs. Closer to our houses we did find a couple, none of which were all that remarkable. So it seemed that we picked a good weekend to go off and explore new territory … not the most fruitful day ever, but not a bad haul either!