Yard Sale Bloodbath

When you are actually in Berkeley, it can be pretty darn Berkeley. Just check out these books …

This was at a block sale, not too far from my parents’ house, where it looked like someone was getting rid of their entire book collection, dating back to at least the early ’70s … leaning heavily towards the feminist, radical, and groovy.

I grew up here, so this was all pretty familiar territory. After all, it wasn’t until long after leaving the Berkeley Unified School District that I learned that most places didn’t get a day off on March 8th for International Women’s Day.

It was fun to dig through the books.

Sometimes even the back covers were good reading.

As easy as it is to poke fun at this stuff, I think it’s awesome that people were self-publishing their own freaky stuff back in the day — or even today! But that doesn’t mean that some of it isn’t kind of ridiculous.

Like this guide to communes. Can you spot the naked dudes? How about the guy rocking the turtleneck with no pants?

It’s not just a list of communes (including the Hog Farm: “about 75 people living on 14 acres of land in New Mexico, all taking care of each other and this one hog and her friend … and 15 chickens that lay ten eggs a day on methedrine”), it also has articles like “How to Make Group Marriage.”

This is the end of the article. Is that the answer?

Another magazine had some pretty great classified ads.

And of course, there were guidebooks on how to build your own geodesic dome.

Honestly, I was surprised that it hadn’t been cleaned out by book dealers, and I sort of hoped whatever was left over would get donated to a library, because a lot of that stuff was super obscure and interesting. We left a lot behind, but between me, my husband, and my dad, we ended up with a bit of a pile …

This weekend was the Olympic Manor neighborhood sale, otherwise known to us as the “season closer. It’s been really good, it’s been really bad, but we have hit this sale for at least the last nine years. The sales have started to meld together over the years and some houses seem to have the exact sale sale year after year.

The very first sale was so bunk that they guy was selling a used, dirty, kitty poop scooper. Are you fucking kidding me? Of all the things in life that I would feel comfortable buying new, poop scooper is at the top of the list. What are people thinking?

This year we hit a few duds, but then we hit one of the more memorable sales. It was crazy shopper lady mixed with all of the preppy daughter’s junk from the ’80s. I really started to lose my mind at this sale. Hobie ’80s bathing suits with screwed up day-glo colors? Check! Yeah, like 8 of them. What about ’80s jazz flats? Tons.

Jenny scratched the surface of the insanity with the Valley Girl’s Guide to Life book and modeling books. How about the Electronic Mall Madness game?!?!

Yes, that ended up in my trunk, since the guy refused to take my money otherwise. “No, I really don’t need that.” “Yes, of course you do. It’s free. I am giving it to you with your items.” I am too polite. Please note this is huge and comes with a fake credit card machine and the record store at the mall is called “Scratchy’s.” At least they didn’t also make me haul off this large painting (dated 1964).

Soon after that we stopped at a sale that they have every year in their garage. This year they had gotten a little crazy with their sign.

They always seem to have a very tidy and organized way of arranging things.

We have all purchased stuff there before so I can’t bag on it too badly, but this year it was a bust.

All in all it seemed a little better than the last few years, but mainly because of that one sale where I went crazy and a few other scores. A lot of houses really just had crap.

At least some of it was free, but even so. Sticking a sign on your old toilet does not magically turn it into “yard art.”

One of the last good sales had some really good books. As I was pulling some stuff out, Jenny pointed to a CD, quietly saying something about not wanting to embarrass the person running the sale. In my mind, it’s your sale — don’t you know what you have?

So, I held it up and the woman says “I don’t know where those CDs came from.” Yes, if that is in your pile of CDs, claiming that you know nothing is the correct answer.

We did hit a few sales outside of the neighborhood, but I think everything we purchased came from Oly Manor sales.

We hit a neighborhood sale last weekend. Meghan’ll be dishing up the full scoop soon, but first I wanted to take a moment to share a small portion of what has to be one of the strangest and most terrifying selections of books I have seen in some time.

The books spanned a range of genres and eras.

But most of them offered some sort of advice.

Many were charmingly dated.

Or even hilariously dated.

Some were direct and to the point (perhaps a bit threateningly so).

And then there was this. Sure, times have changed, but how was this title ever a good idea?

I guess if a pile of books is gonna be bad, at least it’s more fun to look through when they’re this bad.

Going to sales on Labor Day weekend — is it ever great? Judging from the last three years I would have to say no. But going to yard sales is like playing slots: you never know when your very next try is gonna get you that big win. So off we went … with skies looking suspiciously greyer every minute.

We made a few stops close to home, then decided to check out an estate sale that had possibilities. We got there about 9:10 and there were about ten people waiting outside. I thought there must’ve been a bunch of people waiting earlier if they couldn’t let everyone in at once, but then it turned out that they weren’t opening up until 10! With so many other sales nearby I failed to see the logic of waiting that long in the cold for this one (which sounded okay, but not amazing) so we went to an estate sale nearby which was already up and running. I was a little baffled by the way they chose to hang their sign.

At least it was a bright color, but it didn’t look any better from the front …

Another interesting set-up choice: placing (or leaving?) this one item outside with a “for sale” sign (but no price).

This sale was pretty much a dud, so we headed off to get coffee, but found a surprise estate sale along the way. It was the kind of sale that was wacky enough that you kept thinking there had to be SOMETHING great there. I mean, with a toilet paper cozy like this, they had to be insane, right?

They had also managed to hold on to this box of Calgon for oh … seventy years or so.

Meghan found a few patterns and someone mentioned there had been tons of old patterns back at the estate sale with the line … so we put off coffee that much longer and headed back up there. It was only about 10:15 so we figured we might as well check it out. The patterns turned out to be a bust (boring and not that old) but they did have some fascinating items here and there.

I left empty-handed and perused the junk in the garage while waiting for Karl and Meghan to come out.

Soon enough, Meghan emerged. She’d picked up a couple things, including this mindblowing 1972 “Hang In There, Baby” poster.

Karl was fascinated by this “Gypsy Music” LP he’d dug out of a pile … mainly based on the song titles.

By this time it was fully raining, and after finally getting coffee we forged on ahead. Our next stop was listed as “vintage yard sale” which is always enticing, even though you know it probably also means “overpriced.” With this one I didn’t ever find out if it was overpriced or not, because everything was just sitting out getting wet. Who is going to want to buy 8-track tapes that have been soaking in the rain?

I couldn’t understand why they weren’t making an effort to keep things dry. They did have a couple of covered areas and it seemed like they would have moved things under them … especially books and things that really shouldn’t get wet. Although with some items, wet or dry wouldn’t really impact their desirability.

Next, we tried to hit a yard sale whose address was at a taco truck (!), but when we drove by there was no sale in sight. (Perhaps they came to their senses and waited for a drier day.) At that point we came to our senses and decided to just give up and get breakfast instead. So the haul was small … but at least there were a few nice (or at least strange) finds.

I spent about two and a half weeks in Europe this summer. Yes, it was hard to tear myself away from the prospect of several weekends of yard sales … oh, who am I kidding. Yard sales were still gonna be there, I didn’t think twice about taking a few weeks off! Secondhand shopping really wasn’t the focus of the trip, but naturally there were some junky adventures here and there. And naturally I took a few pictures.

Our first stop was London. Here we hit the Saturday market at Portobello Road. Most of the stalls and shops are either new stuff, or full on pricey antiques, but if you walk far enough up the road eventually you find more of the oddball secondhand vendors.

There were plenty of vintage clothes dealers. Most of it was the same old stuff, but this tiny MC Hammer sweater was certainly anything but.

Seriously, how can that even exist?! It kind of blew my mind.

I liked almost everything at this guy’s stand … unfortunately, most of it was either large or too breakable to risk getting home.

Check out this crazy end table! That chair’s not bad either.

Most of the vendors had their things laid out neatly, but this one went for the ever-popular “throw shit in boxes and dump it all on the street” approach.

Then there was this half-mannequin. Not sure what someone was really thinking …

We also hit Old Spitalfields Market. Last time I was here, my camera ran out of batteries. This time I made sure to take plenty of pictures.

It was Thursday — antique day! Almost every stall was crammed full of vintage goodies.

Then there was this ram. Need a ram? They’ve got it.

Next, we spent a couple of days in Berlin. I’d read they had some great Sunday fleamarkets, but we were arriving Sunday afternoon so I pretty much wrote that off. Around 5:00 we found ourselves wandering around downtown. We crossed a little bridge onto the Museum Island and discovered a fleamarket happening right there.

Some of the vendors were already packing up, but lots were still open for biz.

There was a little of everything, but it seemed especially heavy on media: books, movies, records, etc.. My husband started flipping through a box of LPs, expecting to find nothing, but ended up with a stack of good stuff at amazing prices – a nice way to kick off the visit!

We spent the next couple days exploring various neighborhoods, checking out various stores, landmarks, and restaurants (and of course, the Museum of Things). Didn’t hit a lot of vintage stores, but here’s one that was pretty cool.

On Monday night I was sitting outside at a restaurant when something on a pole caught my eye. Could it be?

A garage sale sign! Of course, it had already taken place at that point, but just seeing the sign made me smile.

Finally, we spent some time in Istanbul visiting family … and doing some shopping. We did go to some vintage/antique shops, but I neglected my photo-taking responsibilities (or tried and failed to get a decent shot) at all but this one.

I thought this display at a used record store was pretty great.

One night we ate dinner at a restaurant that had an interesting store next to it. It was full of things … and I do mean full.

The stuff was mostly old, mostly jewelry, but it seemed to really have a little of everything.

It was sort of overwhelming, with room after room and nary a free inch of wall space!

Okay, this post is pretty random … I admit, blogging wasn’t at the top of my mind while I was on a much-needed (and much-enjoyed) vacation! But I hope you enjoyed a little taste of Junkeo Internationalo. (That is my made up pseudo-European language there. You like?) Now it’s time to hunker down and focus on Le Crap Americaine for a while. Yee-haw!